Favourite sayings, quotes or philosophies What's yours?

[darren]

    "You know, a long time ago being crazy meant something. Nowadays everybody's crazy."

Charles Manson

[Johnno convert]

If brains were electricity you would be a walking blackout!!
Hiding when the brains were handed out were we?
Not enough brain cells to synapse.
(gee these are negative)
Go climb a tree you semi-evolved simian. Zaphod Beeblebrox
Its life Jim but not as we know it. Spock
I'm Spartacus!!
Hasta lavista Baby!! Sylvester Stallone
I'll be back. Arnie
The difference between you and me is that I make this look good. Will Smith MIB
OK how many of you jumped straight onto the reply button when you saw Stallone and hasta lavista ha ha ha

[dno]

What we've got here , is a failure to communicate . Which is the way he wants it. So he gets it.
Some men you just can't reach.


Movie
Cool Hand Luke.

[kranky al]

cool hand luke rules

[Johnno convert]

YOU WANT THE TRUTH? YOU CANT HANDLE THE TRUTH!!

[darren]

If we are including movie quotes then...

We're dicks! We're reckless, arrogant, stupid dicks. And the Film Actors Guild are pussies. And Kim Jong Il is an a*shole. Pussies don't like dicks, because pussies get f*cked by dicks. But dicks also f*ck a*sholes: assholes that just want to sh*t on everything. Pussies may think they can deal with a*sholes their way. But the only thing that can f*ck an a*shole is a dick, with some balls. The problem with dicks is: they f*ck too much or f*ck when it isn't appropriate - and it takes a pussy to show them that. But sometimes, pussies can be so full of sh*t that they become a*sholes themselves... because pussies are an inch and half away from a*s holes. I don't know much about this crazy, crazy world, but I do know this: If you don't let us f*ck this a*shole, we're going to have our dicks and pussies all covered in sh*t!

[Johnno convert]

Wow I think I will pass on that movie! BTW what was it?

[camdyson]

...courtesy of the late dragon-in-law:

"Well cut my legs off and call me shorty!"

[dno]

GRREEN is nice

[outback jack]

I'd rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy.

[darren]

Wow I think I will pass on that movie! BTW what was it?

Its from the extremely poignant  movie Team America

[darren]

GRREEN is nice

Running on empty??

[kranky al]

Well there's this passage I got memorized. Ezekiel 25:17. "The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the inequities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. Blessed is he who, in the name of charity and good will, shepherds the weak through the valley of the darkness. For he is truly his brother's keeper and the finder of lost children. And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who attempt to poison and destroy my brothers. And you will know I am the Lord when I lay my vengeance upon you." I been sayin' that **** for years. And if you ever heard it, it meant your ass. I never gave much thought what it meant. I just thought it was some cold-blooded **** to say to a mother****er before I popped a cap in his ass. I saw some **** this mornin' made me think twice. See now I'm thinkin', maybe it means you're the evil man. And I'm the righteous man. And Mr. 9 Milimeter here, he's the shepherd protecting my righteous ass in the valley of darkness. Or it could mean you're the righteous man and I'm the shepherd and it's the world that's evil and selfish. Now I'd like that. But that **** ain't the truth. The truth is you're the weak. And I'm the tyranny of evil men. But I'm tryin', Ringo. I'm tryin' real hard to be a shepherd.

[speewa158]

Jack I thought that had been done 

[darren]

Well there's this passage I got memorized. Ezekiel 25:17. "The path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the inequities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men. Blessed is he who, in the name of charity and good will, shepherds the weak through the valley of the darkness. For he is truly his brother's keeper and the finder of lost children. And I will strike down upon thee with great vengeance and furious anger those who attempt to poison and destroy my brothers. And you will know I am the Lord when I lay my vengeance upon you." I been sayin' that **** for years. And if you ever heard it, it meant your ass. I never gave much thought what it meant. I just thought it was some cold-blooded **** to say to a mother****er before I popped a cap in his ass. I saw some **** this mornin' made me think twice. See now I'm thinkin', maybe it means you're the evil man. And I'm the righteous man. And Mr. 9 Milimeter here, he's the shepherd protecting my righteous ass in the valley of darkness. Or it could mean you're the righteous man and I'm the shepherd and it's the world that's evil and selfish. Now I'd like that. But that **** ain't the truth. The truth is you're the weak. And I'm the tyranny of evil men. But I'm tryin', Ringo. I'm tryin' real hard to be a shepherd.

Check out the big brain on Brad..

[dno]

Bit of good Aussie car culture.
Those bloody Gazard boys.
Another tho not Aus is, Vanishing point.

[Darcy7]

When a man turns 60, there are 3 golden rules:

1.  Never trust a fart
2.  If you have the oportunity to urinate, do it
3.  If you get an erection, use it

...Billy Connolley

[outback jack]

a standing cock hasn't got a conscience

[outback jack]

 

Jack I thought that had been done 

who is speewa ? 

[BigJules]

Check out the big brain on Brad..

Hamburgers, the cornerstone of any nutritious breakfast.

[Black Diamond]

  Plenty of good one's from the 'Castle' 

How's the serenity.

Tell him he's dreaming.
.
BD

[speewa158]

Jack  who is Arrrr ... Ummm  what was the ,,,, Hellow nice to see you again ,,,, have I 

[outback jack]

Jack  who is Arrrr ... Ummm  what was the ,,,, Hellow nice to see you again ,,,, have I 

we better meet up and decide if we have met each other before 

[Fivid]

97% of fords ever made are still on the road... the rest made it home

Always put off to tomorrow what you can avoid doing today (a reverse of what my old man used to tell me and it drove him crazy)

Was that a cat or a speed bump?  Is there a difference?

Cat - The other white meat!

I don't have tourettes, your just a %@$!

Get a taste of religion, lick a witch

The bible was written by the same people who said the world was flat.

Fertilise the bush, doze in a greenie

The only true wilderness is between a greenies ears

Life is sexually transmitted

And to finish, something I saw on a little kids shirt one day....  All daddy wanted was a blow job!


Dave

[outback jack]

as popular as a turd in a tucker box