Telephone Marketers

[Bird]

I've had 4 calls today from0731234102
google finds floods of Shit on it from last few days, towelhead telemarketers flogging funeral insurance.

So, I thought Hmmmmmmm.......
How can I communicate with them so they understand
http://www.youswear.com/index.asp?language=Hindi#.UdKezmZ--K4
*norty word warning*... but it should get the message across.

[Bird]

How to deal with telemarkers..

Telemarketer: Hello sir, would you be willing to take a short study?

Me: Absolutely! We here at Evermoon Consulting are always ready to provide opinion based data to our clients!

Telemarketer: Um... ok? The survey just takes 5 minutes and when finished, you are entered into a drawing to win a 3 day vacation to Cancun.

Me: Our usual remuneration per our standard service agreement is all that is required. However, please be aware that our lowest billable period is one hour and this call will be billed for an hour of service even if only five minutes is used.

Telemarketer: No sir, this will only take five minutes, not an hour.

Me: I understand. However, your firm will still be billed the minimum hour as per our services agreements. That comes to $225. How would you like to take care of this today? Do you have billing set up with us already? If so, I just need the corporate code for your company.

Telemarketer: I don't have that...

Me: That's alright sir, we can set this up on a company credit card for a small fee. Your new total will be $257.98. Go ahead and give me the credit card number, sir.

Telemarketer: We aren't paying $257 for this!

Me: Oh, you are absolutely right, sir! We are talking after 6 PM CDT, so we are in "premium time". Your total will be $517.54. Thank you for reminding me!

Telemarketer: What!? The law says we can call until 9 PM.

Me: Evermoon Consulting prides itself on meeting our customer's needs 24 hours a day, but between 6 PM and 6 AM is premium time. I am ready for that credit card number.

Telemarketer: Look, I didn't call you, a computer did.

Me: Oh, I see.

Telemarketer: So can we just get to the survey?

Me: Yes, but I will have to add our auto-dialer fee. With that, your new total is $759.99. What are the first four digits of the card you would like us to use, please?

Telemarketer: Hold on for my supervisor, please.

Me: Ok.

Supervisor: Hello sir, I understand there is a problem?

Me: No sir. Your total charges for premium time consulting, auto-dialer charge, supervisor respondent fee and credit card processing is $1,163.67.

Supervisor: For what!?

Me: Consulting on your survey, of course. What method of payment will you be using today?

*Click.*

Read more: http://capitalismisfreedom.com/troll-with-telemarketers/#ixzz3wt8FHxmS

[Snapman007]

^^^👍👍

[Bird]

http://www.theage.com.au/technology/technology-news/phone-robot-keeps-annoying-telemarketers-talking-for-as-long-as-possible-20160201-gmj83u.html

[Troopy_03]

Haha, that's gold bird. Funny when he says "are you f'kn stupid man" and he's talking to a robot.. 

[Bird]

Haha, that's gold bird. Funny when he says "are you f'kn stupid man" and he's talking to a robot.. 

[cancan]

Local elections are on so getting spam calls...it seems political parties are exempt from the do not call register...

[Troopy_03]

Local elections are on so getting spam calls...it seems political parties are exempt from the do not call register...

Do Not Call Register Exemptions apply to:

    registered charities
    educational institutions
    government bodies
    registered political parties
    social researchers
    opinion pollsters.