Hospital Gowns

[xcvator]

What I have learnt in the last week 
These things have never been through any r&d or consolidation, so far in the last 6 days I've worn been covered by 4 different styles
They are strictly for tropical climates only, can you imagine sleeping in a tent with the bl@@dy back door wide open 
You've gotta have rubber arms 6 feet long to tie up the back flap ties 
and this is the really good part, if you don't roll the bl@@dy thing completly up and on your lap when you take a dump the tags at the back can get covered in sh1t. and remember you don't have 6 foot log rubber arms so what to do ? Ha, you think, I'll just pull it over my head, easy fixed,sure it is !!!! So as you pull this sh1tty gown over your head you realise that you can feel this cold damp strip up your back and you know instantly what it is, and remember those rubber arms? So now into the shower, bloody hell, the towells haven't been replaced from this morning, damn, hit the call button and wait,so here you are, wet, getting cold but not sh1tty any more  and then comes the good bit, explaining to the nurse why you are in the shower for the 2nd time today and just why do you need a clean gown again 
Oh yes, I reeeaaaaly love hospital gowns 

[baldheadedgit]

Geez your a bloody sook....

BHG

[xcvator]

Geez your a bloody sook....

BHG

It'll take more than that to get off my list 

[baldheadedgit]

Bet they dont look as good on you as they do on me.

[Jeepers Creepers]

Get a room, you two.

[xcvator]

Bet they dont look as good on you as they do on me.

Photoshopped

[baldheadedgit]

Sounds like a good idea,, you bring the grog Xcvator

[Bird]

Brown streak to cover your yella one...

[ehsc]

I know just what you mean excavator and the paper undies they get you to wear before a opp an't real flash also  ehsc

[Jeepers Creepers]

Hey BHG,

I see not 1 vase of flowers, no chocolates, no lollies, no fruit.......
good to see no one wants to sit around ya campfire or ya hospital bed. 

[baldheadedgit]

Only you Jeepers,,, only you... no one else would think along them lines..

[Brett B]

Bloody Gowns
I spent about 3 months in hospital in the end l just wore tracky dacks and t shirt 

[Paul (SA)]

I don't hear Tjupurula complaining.

[johnyd]

Hurray for hyper-mobile shoulders.  I had no problems doing up the backs of mine when I had the appendix out a few months ago.  I did put it on back-to-front (open at the front) the first time though.  I thought they'd need the front open to slice up me gut, it is where all the scars are so I'm guessing they got rid of it somewhere along the line.

[Memem284]

I am a nurse in a colorectal (bowel) surgical ward and I have seen all variations of gowns......and the stuff you can "spill" on them. Wow! It is definitely not dinner conversation!
But, when a patient gets embarrassed  by their bodily functions, I tell them "it's all about your bowels here - we wanna know when you pass wind, open you bowels and what it looks like!"
......sometimes I think my previous career owning a pub was easier..........

[johnyd]

......sometimes I think my previous career owning a pub was easier..........

At least you only had to listen to people talk Shit there.

[MarkGU]

Bet they dont look as good on you as they do on me.

was it cold in the hospital ward that day Steve? 

[Mallory Black]

ahem your camel toe is showing

[MarkGU]

ahem your camel toe is showing

great........now i have to close my eyes and see that picture in my head. 

[Foo]

ahem your camel toe is showing

I thought the same but didn't want to say it. Discretion being the better part of valor. 

Foo

[baldheadedgit]

Stop picking on my toe,     

[baldheadedgit]

Was trying to hide me marbles   
No    there are no more pics !!

[MarkGU]

Was trying to hide me marbles   
No    there are no more pics !!

THANK $&%* FOR THAT

[xcvator]

Was trying to hide me marbles   
No    there are no more pics !!

I thought you'd lost em   

[GUEY]

Whats that old saying - something about nice legs, shame about the face.






Legs aren't real flash either. Sorry mate.