A little nail gun humour ...

[Mandrake]

I guess like all of us I receive spam fairly often -- here's part of one I received today about a Bosch electric nail gun ...

If anyone can translate this into Aussie let me know ... These are the "Usage Notes " !!! 

Usage note:
1, set up after a nail bomb, pipe is prohibited to directly push the nail by hand.
2, do not nail bombs packed Powder actuated tool at others.
3, the shooting process, if nail bomb not mad, quiet stop for 5 seconds, you can move the nail.
4, in the end of the nail is used, or repair, maintenance should first remove the nail bombs.
5, the soft (such as wood) or substrate by firmware shooting, select power to appropriate nail bombs, power will be interrupted
Piston rod.
6, the nail with the length of time should be timely replacement of wearing parts (such as piston rings), or shot effect is not ideal (for example
Power down).
7, shooting out the back, wipe or clean nail parts in a timely manner.
Instructions for 8, a variety of nail, should read the instructions before use, and understand the principles of the nail, performance, structure,
Disassembly and Assembly methods, and compliance considerations.
9, in order to ensure your safety and that of others, supporting the use of strict and broad strength nailing equipment.


Best regards,
Daniel Hoo, sales manager
www.tiangongtool.net

And this bit ---

Working principle
Electric nail gun shells equipped with acceleration in the coil to accelerate the orbit has a Shaper in the coil, shaper Body Shaper tracks move through the shaper body made from magnetic materials, shaper-body front end with the firing pin, the controlling switch controlled electric nail gun. Shaper Body Shaper higher with at least two exclusive profiles on the outer surface of the wheel, wheel around its PIN shaft rotating. When the wheel rim with Shaper Body Shaper track contact, the shaper tracks with the friction of the roller arm was significantly greater than the friction arm on the pin of the roller, roller can be flexible around its PIN turned in order to achieve effective reduces friction in the Shaper in motion, reducing electric nail gun fever, improve the life of the nail gun.

[Foo]

It says what?    Must have been translated into double Dutch. 
 
Foo

[Nay-DMAX]

Something about a shaper shaper shaper. How many times did they want to use that word.

[scarps]

Just like days in the week.
Monday, Tuesday, then W, T, F?

[lino6]

Sounds a bit like Chinglish.

Setup after a nail bomb - that makes sense you wouldn't do it before the nail bomb.....

[cruisindub]

ok,
Not a Nail Gun, ...............What about a staple gun??

So, Talking of staples,

Little DIY accident.........Testing out my new Roybi One+ Brad Nailer.

Not quite,
This happened to me yesterday morning, 4 hrs at A&E.
I collapsed having a seizure and put my head through bathroom wall.
4 Hrs A&E, 4 Staples, 1 Big headache.

CT Scan and ECG machine said everything was fine.

Dont know whats worse, the ruined haircut or the shaved chest for the electrodes.

I've now since added 'Repair bathroom wall' to the DIY list of things to do.

[cruisindub]

See,
still suffering the effects.


Forgot to add the attachment..............

[scarps]

See,
still suffering the effects.


Forgot to add the attachment..............

ouch, glad your ok, but think they went overboard with the staples.
Sikaflex would have done a cleaner job:-)

[cruisindub]

yeah,

I wasnt too sure about it either.
Couldnt see what was going on back there, had to get a friend to take a photo for a look myself.

Wasnt too sure about the 'Doc' either.
They couldnt find him and after quite some time, in comes a bloke with cargo pants and t'shirt. I kinda expected someone a bit more 'Doctory' looking. You know, either scrubs or trousers, shirt etc.

Maybe they couldnt find him, but the maintenance man had just finished his break and was free?!? He'll do...........

[scarps]

yeah,

I wasnt too sure about it either.
Couldnt see what was going on back there, had to get a friend to take a photo for a look myself.

Wasnt too sure about the 'Doc' either.
They couldnt find him and after quite some time, in comes a bloke with cargo pants and t'shirt. I kinda expected someone a bit more 'Doctory' looking. You know, either scrubs or trousers, shirt etc.

Maybe they couldnt find him, but the maintenance man had just finished his break and was free?!? He'll do...........

nah, these days the maintenance guy would have been the well dressed one:-)

[briann532]

YIKES

[speewa158]

Let it be known to 1 & all l had nothing to do with the righting of the instructions if you can call them that    & it not making any sence to me  ( but it might later  )